21/30

today's focus of celebration: gratitude for solitude

i'm naturally wired to work behind the scenes, quietly crafting on my own.
and, i have discovered, there is one area of my life where even i am in need of others, I must do the work on my own.
it's in my daily meditation practice.

i've always sat on the cushion-on and off, here and there, now and again.
but i've never sat as i do now; with the understanding and effort that is essential for what it takes to settle in deeply and feel change profoundly. or feel, for that matter. down to the bones, hard in the gut.
in the past, it was always the next this workshop, or that book, or the next class.
sure, i got a moment of peace or bliss or motivation or quiet.

and then, it was back to my regular routine.
and, it wasn't pretty.

although no one can get me on the cushion besides myself, I couldn't do it the way i now do without the blessing of others who have walked this road before me. who are now walking the walk with me. who are there when i need them, and they now when i need to travel on my own.
so, even though i am sitting in solitude and silence, i hear the echo of others offering their service.
even if it is just holding the space.

and, I am grateful.














copyright 2009 Alisa Barry